The Former “Biblical Patriarchalist” Muses on Gender Roles and Christ…

This was an excellent post (The Effect of Biblical Womanhood on a Woman’s Self-Image), albeit a few years old, from the Happy Feminist. I came from the world Crystal writes about (here, the comments being very enlightening) and I know well the way one thinks within it.

It is fair to say that these women, on the one hand, see NO disparity between calling themselves equal and then, in the same breath, share that their femaleness makes them more emotional, more inclined toward error, etc.  In other words, they are practicing double-speak.  That, or advocating a kind of equality that is much more limited than the concept of equality most concieve of. 

I believe these women are well-intentioned and good hearted. They truly want what is best and believe that they are following what is best. 

Note the preconcieved ideas inherent in the discussion there, though. “Head” takes on a full meaning that is NOT it’s actual Greek meaning, for example. There are so many concepts READ INTO the text, instead of extrapolated FROM the text.

That part troubles me.  In the name of God, is it possible that patriarchy involves practices/philosophies that are far from His heart for man and woman? As a Christian who does not see patriarchy supported by the Bible, I think so.  Genesis 1 and 2, where we see man and woman before the Fall broke our world, shows me two beings who were different and yet stood side by side (not one over the other, not one under the other). 

Did practicing ”Biblical” patriarchy in my own home set us free or hem us in? I would say that the 8 or so years of “Biblical” patriarchy did more damage to our relationship than anything else—damage to both of us.

I love my husband.  I don’t even have strong enough words to use—in fact, saying “I love him” sounds so empty when I compare it to the way I feel about him deep within my heart.  I value his input and his opinion, and I enjoy serving him and showing him honor, but I do those things because I see him as a brother in Christ—-as a soul loved by God—-as a friend and as a lover.  I do NOT serve him because he is male and I am female.

Jesus called us all to the Law of Love, not to the law of gender roles.  After all, what are the two greatest commandments?  Yet ever since the Fall, we’ve been preoccupied with gender roles (Gen. 3:16 promised as much, I suppose).  Considering the press some “ministries” give to the salvation found through adopting ”Biblical” roles, I find it interesting that the current level of thundering applause for male/female roles (found in much of the ultra-conservative Christian sub-culture) is strikingly absent when we read through the four Gospels.  Either the Gospels are out of balance…or maybe, just maybe, we are. 

The way to a good marriage relationship is not through gender roles (though one can use those as a vehicle, because there’s nothing wrong with gender roles in and of themselves.  In fact, adopting roles in a relationship may be a very functional helpful thing)! 

But what did Jesus want for men and women?  Did He want sharp distinctions between men and women?  Did He want women in dresses and men in pants?  Did He want women to think of themselves as easily decieved and needful of male authority?  Did He want men to see women as creatures needing controlled/led from birth to death? 

 Or did He talk about things faaaar above our silly little human pre-occupations?  Did He move out of the realm of our fallen little visions and spent His time painting us beautiful pictures like Vines and Branches and the Life ebbing and flowing within them, Shepherds and Sheep and the valley pastures and the trusted voice, Grace Beyond Measure that can come like rain on the dry field, Captives Set Free from pits that they’d long since given up hope of escaping, Blind Eyes Made Whole and seeing for the first time shapes and figures slowly coming into focus, a world that had been hidden in darkness now coming into form…  

I feel like that about discovering Love. 

Love delights.

Love respects.

Love rejoices.

Love loves.

Despite the rhetoric to the contrary, gender roles are NOT required in order to have a happy home. Note that the Sermon on the Mount, etc, did not involve treatise on the roles of the sexes. Note that Paul’s words in Ephesians were to a culture that PRACTICED patriarchy (of the very strict sort!). When Paul told slaves to obey their masters, was he advocating slavery, or was he just speaking to what existed in that society? When Paul told women to submit to their husbands, was he advocating patriarchy, or was he just repeating the already existing legal code in that world?

When Paul told men to love their wives as Christ loved the Church, was he advocating patriarchy?

I would say that the correct answer is, No.  He blew patriarchy to smithereens.

If you love someone as you love your own self, will you put them under your rule?  Will you see them as an object to manage?  Does a head view a body as a seperate entity from itself?     

The rulers of that world (the men) were told to love the underlings of that world (the women) as Christ loved His Bride.   So how did Christ love the Church in the book of Ephesians? Does Ephesians 1-2 talk about how Christ rules over the Church?

No.

It talks about how Christ raised the Church up to His level, put her in a place of rulership next to Him, put all things under Her feet!

In the name of doing things “Biblically,” how the patriarchs miss the thrust of Ephesians. It’s not a book about who-is-under-who in a heirarchy. It’s a book about the power of Love bringing UP what the world (and sin and death) has kept low.  And that’s a Gospel I want to be a part of spreading.