Pictures of the Molly Diva (Oooh, Oooh, Stand Back)!

Okay, just kidding (the title) . It’s all smack, one of my favorite languages. I specialize in pig-latin and smack. Smack comes out in Monopoly and ig-latin-pay omes-cay out in oments-may en-whay I ant-way to say something ecret-say ithout-whay the kids atching-cay on. Anyways, on to the pictures [click to enlarge] of Her Greatness, because that’s what you’re all really here for, isn’t it?

Here I am being the wonderful and amazing mother that I am. Notice the hug—it’s as if I give them fifty thousand times a day, isn’t it? Did you notice the natural-ness of the pose (ignore the fact that I’m listening to a Steve Brown Etc. podcast, puh-lease—my mind was FULLY engaged with my child, I swear it!). And, well, that’s because I am just that good. Yes, my children shall rise up and call me blessed. After a few psychotherapy appointments, of course, to work through a few issues, like, say, when their mother began frothing at the mouth yesterday over the fact that we’ve lost SEVEN pairs of mittens this winter (and the snow hasn’t even melted yet!!!!$#%^&*)!!!!!!! Don’t worry. I came out of fetal position…eventually.

Here I am posing in the costume/make-up room before getting into my opening outfit for The King and I. That, for those unenlightened, is what makes a hoop skirt into a hoop skirt. I never had to wear any hoop skirts for the play, and was glad of it (I can barely walk normally in pants, much less a big bell), but they sure LOOK cool. I can’t believe that used to be standard fair for women. And corsets!? (Oh man, how could anyone have a working brain with that little oxygen going to it? Not that men haven’t had their fair share of silly clothing articles, of course)…

And THIS picture…? This one is my favorite. Here I am expounding to my best friend, Lydia, (at an indoor pool party for one of her six kids) about what she should think about everything, and why. Note her look of admiration and complete adoration. This, my dears, is exactly why we are friends. (I, er, won’t show you her facial expressions in the other pictures that got DELETED). She truly understands that a genius is in her midst, and responds accordingly. If I could find more people like that, I’d probably have more friends. So take note of that. You have a big opportunity in front of you. All it takes is recognizing me it for the wonderful chance it is.

And they said having a role in this play would go to my head. HA! I’m as humble as I ever was—maybe even more so.